21 November 2006

The Great Turkey Conspiracy

Let me get this straight: I love my grandmother.

She just doesn't get things done on time. She almost missed my parents' wedding! In recent years, we have taken to telling her family functions start 2 hours earlier than everyone else. She still shows up an hour late. So when I discovered that she was doing the turkey for Thanksgiving dinner, I couldn't believe it. It would be scrumptious, but everything else would be stone-cold (and mashed potatoes & gravy are so much better warm) by the time we would be able to eat it.

I talked my mother out of making another Turkey, but suggested that some ham might be nice for variety (that way we won't be meatless). I further instigated my mother to start the Great Turkey Conspiracy. Today was recruitment day. The Uncle Bs would be happy to revolt. Uncle K may, too. Various cousins may yet join.

What, you may ask, is the aim of our Conspiracy? To have Thanksgiving dinner ON TIME, even if the Turkey isn't done yet! No waiting! Warm gravy! Hot rolls! Cold salads! Fluffy mashed potatoes that still melt butter for everyone! Join us! It is time to test our strength against the years of tyranny, oppression, and tradition!

Quite revolutionary, I know. But drastic times call for drastic measures.

I'm hoping I don't get into too much trouble for this.

1 comment:

Th. said...


I won't tell on you.